posted 02-07-2000 02:47 PM            

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Reading VenusEnvy's thing about the Salty Plum Suckers from hell reminded me of an important lesson: beware of foreign candy.

One of my Thai friends once gave me some taffy-like substance imported from Thailand, and it had to be the most god-awful thing I've ever put in my mouth. It seriously tasted like grass (not the good kind) and had the texture of a balloon. If you are a bovine creature who enjoys chewing cud, I'd recommend this candy. Otherwise, stick with Nerds and Twix.

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posted 02-07-2000 04:15 PM            

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Let me just say that that article was the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. I agree with Josh about the foreign candy -- my aunt, who lives in Japan, has a habit of mailing me Japanese stuff. I get uneasy when I can't discern what the candy is from the label. I get especially uneasy when the only English words, in large, proud type, are: "Made With (insert bizarre-sounding chemical here)!"

Nerds and Twix, indeed... stick to something where you can label all the parts, like a good old Hershey bar.

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1/2 of p://learuirka.xidus.net

"Insert Witty Quotation Here"

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posted 02-07-2000 04:28 PM          

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If anyone gets near my Three Musketeers, Reeses, or Skittles, they're going DOWN.

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BaldGhoti
http://www.baldghoti.com
Hail Eris. All hail Discordia. Fnord?

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posted 02-07-2000 06:31 PM             

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Gotta agree here... foreign candy is nasty! I had a prof from Finland once, and he brought it upon himself to bring us Finnish candy on the last day of class. Imagine a big chewy lump of fishy licorice. It was the grossest thing I've ever tried to eat in my life. Of course, the whole class was trying to find somewhere to spit it out, and he was just laughing uproariously at the stupid American kids.

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posted 02-07-2000 06:57 PM             

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Say what you will about America; school sucks, your jobs suck, the government sucks, people suck...but at least we have decent food. And for that, I am wholeheartedly grateful. I can still taste that salt!

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The Goddess VenusEnvy

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posted 02-08-2000 02:22 AM             

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This girl I work with gave me a piece of this Irish candy. A chocolate bar... with fucking POP ROCKS inside of it. Oh my god. It was the best candy I've ever had.... Well... besides just regular Pop Rocks. I really don't like chocolate too much. It kicked ass though, really.

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posted 02-08-2000 08:53 AM           

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I found a site that rates bad candy... The guys actually do it for a hobbie! I think that the Plum Suckers are on that page, as well as something called Double Zout (Black licorice and double salt). Uuugh...
http://www.videogamenews.net/badcandy/

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posted 02-08-2000 08:56 AM           

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I found a site that rates bad candy... The guys actually do it for a hobbie! I think that the Plum Suckers are on that page, as well as something called Double Zout (Black licorice and double salt). Uuugh...
http://www.videogamenews.net/badcandy/

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posted 02-08-2000 09:12 AM           

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VenusEnvy,

Do you write for the aforementioned site? It's funny... but their review of the Salted... Plum.. whatever the hell it was called... is almost word-for-word what you wrote.

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posted 02-08-2000 11:33 AM             

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I had this airline food once a guy brought me from his trip to Japan. It's not candy, but you'd think airline food would be mostly inoffensive, right? There was this freeze dried fish that was tough as hell (but otherwise not too bad), but then there was this package of "Bamboo Shoots" (little circles of "bamboo" floating it their own... uh... juices...) I can still remember the taste, and it's been four years. Never have I had anything so disgusting. Then I imagined a whole plane full of people cracking open their bamboo shoots and doubled over in a fit of horrified projectile vomiting...

[This message has been edited by Keith McNally (edited 02-08-2000).]

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posted 02-08-2000 01:13 PM             

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Ooooo... yer busted. Dizzamn.

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http://jimbosworld.org

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posted 02-08-2000 03:20 PM             

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Incidentally, if you haven't been to that Page Of Bad Candy that Tylin linked to yet, go now! I gotta tell ya, I read every single word, followed every single link, and laughed until I fucking cried.

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http://jimbosworld.org

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posted 02-08-2000 04:21 PM             

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[Note from Mark: This is where it gets good]

Yep, my cousin owns that site. I help them with the content but specifically asked...no BEGGED... them not to post my picture. I'm an incurable paranoid!

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The Goddess VenusEnvy
http://www.envyme.com
Come over to the dark side.

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